Colonoscopy Thoughts

Colonoscopy. One of the most dreaded words spoken. Why? Well, I can tell you first hand the answer to that question. I am doing my prep for it as I type. Yes, I really am! I have done this before and I will have to do it again. Depending on the results tomorrow, I will either have to go back in 2-3 years or 5 years. I am hoping for the 5 year news.

I am 35 years old. On my 29th birthday, we realized I was bleeding from someplace, so upon further exam, we (being the doctors & I) realized that I was bleeding from somewhere in my colon. They ruled out everything else, and with the past history of colon cancer on my maternal grandmother AND maternal grandfather's side, they thought they would play it safe and do a colonoscopy. It would be another year and a half before I would schedule it. I made so many excuses: "Well, it is probably nothing, I am so young," and there was the, "I have my hands full with my son's medical condition, and I can't imagine going under anesthesia with my son having seizures that put him in the hospital," and then I wrapped it up with, "Do I really want to do that disgusting prep??" I made a million excuses. And finally I gave in and scheduled it. That was 4 years ago.

It was November of 2006 when I had my first colonoscopy. It was not that bad. The worst part was not knowing what to expect with the actual test, and when it was over, I said to everyone that I complained to for months, that it wasn't that bad. I was scared, though, when the doctor told me he cut out 2 pretty big polyps and that they would have to be tested for cancer. He told me that I will need to go back in 3 years to get re-checked. The polyps turned out to be okay, but it put me on alert that I could potentially die from the same thing both my grandparents died from: colon cancer.

Now, I was supposed to go back for a colonoscopy last year, but I hand my hands full with my autoimmune illness; I was battling something else for most of the year. I had to put it off until now because I couldn't go through a colonoscopy with everything else I was going through, my body could not handle it. When I scheduled my colonoscopy back in the beginning of November, they told me things have changed a bit since the last time I went. The only thing that actually changed was the actual prep. It went from taking a 3oz bottle of laxative prep to a half gallon of disgusting laxative prep. Stupid me, decided to Google the name of the prep, and from what I read, scared the shit out of me. If it weren't for the polyp scare 4 years ago, I probably would have put this off, again. You see, I am right in the middle of the prep as I type; I am half way through the half gallon (of this innocent looking stuff - which looks like water). I could deal with the liquid diet for a day (piece of cake), I could even deal with the results of going to the bathroom 20 times in an hour (easy as pie), I can even deal with the anesthesia tomorrow, and the probability of them finding more polyps and cutting them out and having a fever, pain, & inflammation for 3 days, post-colonoscopy. I can deal with all that. What has me gagging and wanting to vomit, is the taste of the laxative shit. I did everything imaginable to make the taste better, or easier, but I am losing. I was supposed to drink 8 oz every 15 minutes until 32 oz was done in an hour. I did 32 oz in 2.5 hours, and I barely did that. I still have to look forward to drinking another 32 oz to finish my prep completely.

I have to tell you, that after having a IV PICC line put in, having a spinal tap, bone marrow biopsy, 2 c-sections, and a lot of other invasive procedures (while awake), drinking this laxative tops it all as one of the worst things EVER. I keep telling myself with every swig, that I would rather drink it, than die of colon cancer.

So, I have to run (literally), and think about starting my 2nd dose of the most disgusting stuff I have ever consumed in my life.

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Update: I am happy to share with you that my procedure was all good. I am so relieved that it is over. But, I do have to do it again in 4 years, not 5. Maybe next time, they will have found a new & better prep.